Coming Out of the Closet In A Cupboard
by Slightly-irish-dragon
Summary: AU. Hogwarts does't have elevators so Albus locks them in a cupboard. It's a bit funny, very stupid and there's a tiger. Read it, go on you know you want to.


**Something new. Enjoy.**

 **This is your only warning. This fic contains swear words.**

* * *

 **Coming Out of the Closet In a Cupboard.**

"It would seem, that one of your cubs has managed to get themselves trapped in a broom-cupboard." Snape drawled with disinterest.

"Okay...?" I questioned

"One would advise going and retrieving them." He replied with a sniff

I almost asked why he didn't do it himself instead of coming all the way to find me, but this was Snape so I guess that was answer enough.

"Where are they?" I asked with a sigh.

"Third floor, west wing." I nodded and turned to go. "Oh and professor Granger do try not to miss dinner this evening." He said with that annoying smirk of his. 'Why would I miss dinner, that was hours away.' I turned to ask him, only to see the hem of his robes flick around the corner as he walked away. With a shake of my head I made my way towards the west wing. Why any student was there I couldn't figurer out. The west wing was still off limits due to a trapped stairway. Apparently one of the moving staircases had gone a little bit off target and had somehow managed to end up half the castle away from where it was meant to be, and in its attempt to get back got itself jammed, taking out half a wall in the process. But these are the joys of working in a magical castle.

As I entered the west wing I felt a small vibration followed by a chiming sound letting me know that I had entered a restricted area. (A much better warning then a three-headed dog if you asked me.) It was nice to walk this quiet hall, a peaceful reminder of the summer holidays, where the castle was left almost silent. I lost myself in thoughts of the classes I had left to teach today, so I was surprised to find someone else walking the same path. I assume when I heard the footsteps coming from around the corner that the wayward student had managed to free themselves, and so was well prepared to issue detention when I turned the corner and found myself running smack dab into a body quite a bit taller then my own.

"Professor Granger what has bought you to this part of the castle." Minerva asked holding me steady as I regained my balance.

"I assume the same as you Professor Mcgonagall. Oh and please call me Hermione, we've known each other since I was 11, long enough I believe to be on a first name bases, don't you?" I asked with a small exasperated smile.

"Student trapped in a cupboard?" she asked ignoring everything else I had said. "Peeves saw fit to inform me in his own... unique way." Translation, he was shouting/singing about it through the corridors. With a small shake of my head at the stubbornness of a certain headmistress, I turned to walk down the hall, hearing the soft tap of her heals as she followed soon after. It didn't take us long to reach the cupboard in question. (which was actually an old classroom that had been turned into a storage space some time ago.) With a sigh I pulled on the handle expecting it to be jammed shut. To my surprise however it pulled open easily. A quick glance within proved the room to be empty of both student and everything else for that matter.

"It would seem that we have been the butt of some sort of prank." I sighed thoroughly exasperated. I took a step into the little room just to make sure there actually were no students wedged in an unlikely place, (if you've never worked in a school you would not believe the places children somehow find themselves.) when a sound from behind me caused me to turn just in time to see Minerva falling right into me. We fell together into the small room and as my back hit the hard stone floor I heard a high giggling and the sound of the door slamming shut behind us.

"What the hell!" I grunted pulling myself to my feet. I grabbed the door handle, only to be hit with what felt like a mild electric shock. "Peeves! Open this door right now!" I shouted not daring to touch the door again.

"That, was not Peeves." Minerva growled from behind me. I went to question her but she was already talking.

"Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, you will open this door right now or so help me I will shred every one of your robes." She said in a tone voice I hadn't heard since my own school days. "I mean it Albus you will be walking around in your bloody unmentionables for the rest of the year."

I frowned what the hell was Albus even doing here, the bloody man was retired for Merlin's sake.

Again I opened my mouth to speak and again I was interrupted.

"I'm sorry my dear, but it has come to my attention that there is some unresolved... tension between you and the lovely Miss Granger. The other Professors and I have come to the conclusion that without a little push it will remain a problem, and to that end your classes have been covered for the day Miss Granger and Minerva for the foreseeable future I will be retaking my old job. There will be a house-elf to bring you meals, and I personally have warded the room. Have fun lady's." And with that, before we could even try to talk, argue, beg or threaten we heard the distinctive click of the meddling old man's healed boots as he walked away.

 _Half an our later._

"If I ever get my hands on that fucking man it will be more then his robes that get to see the sharp side of my claws!" Minerva half shouted, she had run out of spells to cast ten minuets ago and was now pacing and ranting often switching from English to Gaelic. I would have loved to join her, but I figured at least one of us should keep a level head. Five minutes later though I had had enough.

"Minerva bloody Mcgonagall for the love of Merlin will you shut up and sit down!" Her reaction was so unexpected that I ended up doubled over laughing. She had instantly stopped mid-rant (Gaelic this time) and sat down, only to start scowling when she realized what she'd done. Soon we were both laughing. It was a nice release of tension. I walked to the wall opposite to where she had arranged herself, and then kind of slid down to sit on the floor, still laughing.

"Oh do shut up Hermione." she said still chuckling away herself. I just kind of froze, she had called me Hermione, for the first time ever she had called me by my first name and all it had taken was getting locked in an abandoned classroom by a mad old wizard. And then I was laughing again.

 _Two hours in._

We had pasted the time talking about any number of things, from the latest transfiguration theories, to the most annoying students. (Draco Malfoy for her, Ron and Lavender's son Sam for me.)

"I love Ron I do, he is one of my best friends but that boy of his, ugh he's like both Ron and Lavender's worst traits all rolled into one. I mean no eleven year old boy should be that much of a gossip and I haven't had a single piece of homework from him that wasn't truly dreadful or obviously copped from one of his friends." I explained grumpily.

"Yes that does sound very mush like Mr Weasley and Miss Brown from their school days." she agreed with a small smile. "But think your self lucky, _you_ did not have to teach Draco. I heard the words 'My father will hear about this' at least once a week from that boy."

"Thank Merlin Scorpius takes after his mother" I said with a small chuckle. We were silent for a time, and I found myself thinking over the situation.

"This has to be one of the stupidest situations I've been in." I muttered under my breath not thinking Minerva would hear. But of course she did, she always did.

"Really, I wonder how this even makes your top ten after growing up with Mr Potter and Mr Weasley." She said it with a perfectly straight face but there was a sparkle in her eye and a quirk to her eyebrow that left me, once again, laughing.

 _Four hours in._

That comment had led to a long stretch of swapping tales from past years, and reminiscing about days long past. In two hours I learned more about Minerva Mcgonagall then in all the years I had known her, both as her student and her employee.

"I was surprised when Mr Weasley and Miss Brown announced their intention to marry, it had always seemed like you and he were destined for one another" Minerva said when the conversation lulled. There was a question in that comment somewhere it just took me a moment to find it.

"We had been going out for about a year after the war, when one day, quite out of the blue, Ron informed me that I was rather obviously in love with someone else and that I 'should stop hiding behind him pull up my big girl pants and tell them'." I grinned at the memory. "As you can probably guess I didn't take it to well. I told him to piss off and didn't speak to him again for some time." When I stopped Minerva just looked at me questioningly, when I returned the look she sighed.

"Well don't stop there, what happened!" It wasn't so much a question as a demand.

"It's rather a long story." I explained but Minerva just snorted.

"It's not like we have anywhere to be, is it now?" So it would seem that I would have no choice in telling her. She had removed her outer robe at some point, leaving her in black slacks and a light green Oxford shirt, the top buttons of which were undone. Every time she shifted I caught glimpses of soft pale skin. It was really very distracting, especially when she moved to let her hair down from its prim and proper bun, so that it flowed over her shoulders, framing her face and contrasting beautifully with the creaminess of her skin. In that moment I decided to take Ron's advice. Pulling up my proverbial big girl pants I bit the bullet and started talking.

"When everyone heard that I had stopped talking to Ron and that we had broken up... well you can guess the palaver that caused. Ron then took it upon himself to explain just what had happened to our friends and family." Minerva's groan mirrored mine at the time.

"My reaction exactly. Molly stopped talking to me completely. She had gotten it into her head that I had cheated on Ron and broken her poor little boy's heart. Never mined that within a few weeks he was off with Lavender doing Merlin knows what. The rest of the Weasley's chose to stay out of it completely. Harry started to ignore us both. Looking back this was probably the smartest thing that boy had ever done and Ginny was quite happy to follow his lead _out_ of the danger zone for once." When I paused to collect my thoughts, I took a moment to check Minerva's reaction and was heartened to see her looking a touch angry on my behalf.

"By a month after the brake up none of my friends were talking to me, I still had no clue as to why Ron had left me and I was slowly drowning myself in my work. It was quite a disaster I'll tell you. And then along came Luna." I had to laugh at the confused look on her face as it probably mirrored my own of the time.

"She sweep into the Ministry of Magic like she owned the place, walked right up to me, and proceeded to inform me that she was fed up with seeing me wallowing in self-pity and that 'for the cleverest witch of our age you are being extraordinary dumb. I suspect an infestation of Wrackspurts they are known to cloud even the cleverest of minds. I can help you get rid of them.' and before I could answer she was dragging me out of work in the middle of the day and back to her place, where she helped me see just what Ron had meant when he had said that he and I would not have worked out even without my supposed other love interest." There was a moment of silence before...

"Well don't leave me in suspense Hermione, what did she do that showed you the light as it were?" Minerva asked sounding exasperated. I didn't answer right away. This was it, the moment of truth her reaction to my next statement would be the answer to my own question. Could Minerva Mcgonagall ever be able to love me the way I had loved her for almost as long as I had known her?

"She took me to her bed."

I watched her face as I said it, watched as shock turned to anger and jealousy and then finally her eyes meet mine and they were filled with _hope_. Before ether of us could say a thing the room was filled with thunder and it seemed the very walls were shaking, and then I realized that the walls were shaking in fact the wall and ceiling above where Minerva sat was bulging inward. There was a moment where time froze as I realized just what was happening.

The whole reason we had come here in the first place was to remove a wayward student from a restricted part of the castle. Restricted because of a moving staircase that had gotten itself trapped and was bringing down the walls every time it tried to free itself. Just as it was doing now. As the wall above Minerva started to crumble, I had a split-second to work out how to save her, and in that split-second I decided to pull a Harry. I was going to do some thing incredibly heroic incredibly stupid and it was more then likely going to get me killed.

"SHIFT!" I roared and felt my own body change even as I dived across the distance between us. Once again she followed my instruction without thought and I landed crouched on four paws over a small tabby cat just in time to have several tonnes of wall, ceiling and staircase slam onto my back. There was a fraction of a moment where it seemed I would be able to hold the weight but then with a number of snaps that to me were even louder then the thunder of the world coming down around my ears my bones began to brake and I fell. The last thing I did before darkness took me was curl my broken self around the shaking body beneath me.

Xox

The world seemed to explode around me as I woke, sounds so loud they deafened me, smells so very strong, blood, pain, fear burned my nose and oddly my tongue, agony, every inch of me hurt.

I panicked convinced in that moment that I had never left the war, that we were still fighting.

A voice beside me, shouting _so_ loud.

I reached for my wand, only to find that my arms didn't work right, didn't feel right, that my whole body felt wrong.

That shout again.

I leapt from whatever soft surface I was on and hit the floor hard when my legs didn't work right either.

Something wild rose up from within me, trying to take over as I lost myself in fear.

My eyes opened for the first time and I was blinded, bombarded, overwhelmed by light and colour and movement.

The wild thing reared up again and we roared in anger and fear. Our body now driven by the Wild moved with grace. We leapt up onto a high platform in the corner of the room. Great white paws supported our weight, our long tail kept us balanced as we reared up roaring a challenge to any who would hurt us.

It was the softness of the voice I heard first. So quiet it was nothing more then a whisper, but in a room so loud it hurt, that small bit of quite stood out like a scream in the dead of night. Then there was the stillness of her. She stayed firm, unmoving, an island in a storming sea. We met her eyes and held her stare. There was no challenge within the forest green of her eyes.

Slowly we stilled as well, mirroring her. When she lowered herself to sit upon the floor we followed.

And then she began to sing. Words we did not know in a song we had never heard. Slowly, so slowly that I didn't notice the Wild sank back down into my soul and I was once more Hermione, once more human. With the shift came pain, the pain that I had been ignoring with the help of the Wild and new pain cased by the reshaping of bone and muscle and skin. Even as the darkness reclaimed me, my eyes never left hers not until unconsciousness stole me. I never saw the floor rise to meet me or the strong arms that caught me before the flag stones could kiss my already battered and broken body.

Xox

I woke up in the hospital wing, with its too white everything, it's scratchy sheets, overly clean smell and sighed. I had hoped that becoming a professor would end my habit of ending up in this room seemingly at least once a year.

"At least this time I'm not half cat." I muttered to myself grumpily remembering my second year and cat hairs in potions they should never be in. A tentative clearing of a throat pulled me from my thoughts as an oddly tentative Madame Pomfrey walked over to me.

"So your awake again then Miss Granger." she said sniffing grumpily. "Do try not to destroy any more furniture hmmm?"

"I... what?" I asked thoroughly confused but before she could answer the door banged open and a very pissed off Minerva stormed in.

"I will take it from here if you wouldn't mind Poppy." It was spoken in a clipped voice that left no room for argument. So with one last sniff and an angry glare for me Poppy stormed off into her office making sure to slam the door behind her. The door hadn't even stopped rattling before Minerva thumped down in the visitors chair beside my bed in a very un-Mcgonagall like manner and started to glare at me just as angrily as the matron had.

"What the hell were you thinking? Your a witch for Merlin's sake! And when did you become an animagus? And why didn't you come to me? I would have trained you." The last was said with a sadness I'd never before seen in her eyes. I sighed.

"Minerva I'm sorry but I have know idea what your talking about. I only just woke up, I have no idea why I am once again in this infernal room, why both you and poppy seem to be mad at me or why you think me a fully fledged animagus when I had only just started the process. So please for the love of disaster explain what the hell is going on." By the end I was almost shouting, because really I was in quite a bit of pain and no one seemed willing to tell me anything. Minerva stared at me stunned for a moment.

"You really have no idea what's going on?" She asked amazed

"Not a clue." I answered getting grumpier by the minute.

"It would seem that my entire staff got it into their heads that you and I needed some alone time, and so with the help of a meddling old man trapped us in a broom-cupboard..." I remembered even as she told. The memory's coming back one by one until the moment the wall came down. After that it came to me in a rush of jumbled sensations, confusing and disorientating.

"How did I even shift. I'm not even close to that stage?" I asked still trying to sort though everything In my head.

"Where In the process had you gotten to?" Minerva asked a thoughtful expression crossing her face.

"I had just completed the mandrake, I am almost positive I will never get that taste out of my mouth by the way, and was only a week or so into my meditation. I was so close to meeting my spirit animal I could almost feel her." I answered with a sigh. We both sat for a time trying to understand how I could have shifted without completing the required process. There's a reason very few people ever become animagi, its a long and difficult journey and often people don't like what they find.

"I may be able to help with this dilemma of yours." A voice said from the doorway.

"We want no more of your meddling old man." Minerva snapped at Albus as he walked slowly into the room.

"Come now Min, I said I was sorry."

"Sorry! Sorry! You babbling old fool you almost got us killed with your damn meddling! Oh but that's fine, all is forgiven because you said you're sorry!" Minerva yelled. Albus went to reply but I had had enough.

"Shut up! Both of you. For Merlin's sake. Now would someone please tell me how the hell I managed to do the impossible and shift before I even got half way though the training necessary?" there was a moment of silence as Albus and Minerva seemed to have a staring contest, I was just about to start shouting again when with a huff Minerva sat back down in the visitors chair, apparently giving Albus permission to say whatever it was he planned to say. I watched with amusement as the old man went from being Albus to once again taking up the mantel of being Professor Dumbledore.

"What you described is not unprecedented, however it is extremely rare. Tell me, you said you had met your spirit animal?"

"No not yet, but I was close and I'm sure it wasn't a bloody tiger."

"As I thought. You were more then likely meant to be an otter. The Patronus Charm is a rather good gage as to what one would become if they were to become an animagi but not always." he seemed to trail off getting lost in his thoughts

"Do get on with it you senile old man." Minerva snapped. Still visibly angry with him. Albus nodded and started talking again this time cutting straight to the point.

"I am only aware of this happening twice before in recorded history. That is not to say it hasn't happened at other times and just not been recorded..."

"Albus!"

"Right, right sorry. Both times this has happened before have been during life threatening situations."

"So it was nothing more then a self-defence mechanism?" I asked, slightly disappointed that it wasn't because I was naturally good at it. It would seem that I would never quite grow out of my need to be academically better then everyone else. I looked down at my hand and was surprised to see Minerva's long fingers entwined with mine. I glanced up to find her eyes already trained on me, a small, soft smile gracing her lips, I felt my own smile grow to match hers and gently squeezed her fingers. A soft clearing of a throat beside us shattered the moment, we turned as one to glare at Albus.

"I wasn't quite finished." He muttered sounding way to much like a grumpy toddler for a man of his age.

"Oh get on with it would you Albus." I sighed, thoroughly exasperated by this point.

"This did not happen because _you_ were in danger, Hermione but because _she_ was." He snapped clearly at the end of his patience. "Twice before this has happened, and each time it was to save the life of a loved one, and not just any loved one but each time it was to save the life of their one true love or soul mate if you believe in them. Now would you please stop dancing around and just admit that you're in love with each other and be done with it." With that Albus spun on his ridiculously high-heels and flounced out of the room.

"Well that's, t-that's just preposterous, I... I mean you're with Luna, and I..." Minerva stuttered and stalled.

"Wait, no, I'm not with Luna!" I exclaimed

"And how could you ever love someone like me... wait you're not with Luna?"

"No we just had sex, she's with Neville, they have a... unique relationship, don't ask." Wait did Minerva just say I could never love someone like her. She said nothing about her being able to love me.

"Minerva?" I asked tentatively "Are you in love with me?"

"I, I yes... yes I think I very much am."

"well ok then." I said and grabbing her by the collar I pulled her to me and finally, finally kissed her. And it was a perfectly wonderfully horrible kiss. Noses bumped, teeth clashed and I fell off the damn bed, but by Merlin it was the best kiss of my life.

 **Ok so this is the longest piece I've ever written, and the first that I have been happy with, so be nice please.**

 **Oh and I've not given up on my other stories just can't seem to find the inspiration to write the next chapters, but never fear I'll get there.**

 **I hope you liked it. Drop me a line if you have something to say.**

 **Thanks.**


End file.
